Psalms 31:3 "For Thou art my rock and my fortress."

Today, after fishing hard all morning, I felt as empty as my stringer, so I stopped by The Rock to get refilled.

I have a place on my beach that I reserve for worship and meditation. I call it The Rock, my chapel by the sea. There is one rock out there surrounded by sea and set on a pedestal of sand. I don't pray to it, but I do concentrate on it as one would a statue, a crucifix or a picture over the baptismal. It isn't God, but it reminds me of Him, always there, unchanging and immovable.

But today when I sat my sea soaked self down in my favorite pew, a sand ledge formed by the sea, I looked out and shouted in the silence, "My rock is gone!" I could feel my soul crumble just like the sand ledge I sat upon.

Out there in the water where my rock always waited, there was a long row of man made cement chunks that had been deliberately placed there to stop beach erosion. That was necessary, but not nice, but how was the country to know that my rock, my fortress was now gone?

I have to admit that at other times in my life I have felt that "God-gone" feeling before. I have tried to pray when I felt as if my prayers only hit the ceiling and bounced back down at me. There have been times that I have searched for the way and have been left there kneeling, due to fear and lack of faith. St. Therese, The Little Flower, called these feelings her time of "aridity," the dry desert of her faithful life. Not being a saint, I just shouted again, "My rock is gone!!"

I sat there feeling sad as if the sea was empty until, not with a thought, but a feeling, I realized that my rock was not gone. I just couldn't see it for the man made things that were keeping me from seeing it, so like the other times in my life that I had felt like God was gone.

Slowly, with my soul's eye, I searched out my rock and there it was, unchanging and immovable. I just had to see it on a whole more spiritual plain. My rock was not gone and never would be.

Dear Lord, when we feel as if You're gone, help us to seek You more deeply. Sometimes manmade things may tempt to cover You up, but thank you for still being there. God won't be gone.